An Endless Work in Progress

Fredo-  When I heard the news my heart sunk to my toes. I was praying that it wasn't true. I searched and searched the internet and there it was. Your family's posts. Heartbroken to have lost their son, brother, cousin, husband, father... I cannot even begin to fathom that you're really gone. You and I had it out pretty badly right before I left your place and got clean but it was all drug fueled. Everything in our lives at that point were. I wish so badly you could have gotten out. I wish so badly you could have found the worth in your life. You were an amazing person. You saved me 100x over from so many different scary, life threatening situations. There was a reason I called you Papa Fredo. You took me under your wing and made damn sure no one fucked with me. Being 15 years older than me, more experienced, and had seen and been through it all I'm thankful that, even under the circumstances, we met. You have been freed from these demons that kept you struggling, ...

It was like any other morning. We woke up, fought til we got our fix and I got into the shower to get ready for work.  When I got out my left leg almost buckled at the knee in excruciating pain. "What the fuck?" I thought to myself. I looked down and saw a bit of redness and swelling that equated to maybe the size of a bug bite. I walked into our bedroom. "It seriously feels like I got kicked in the leg by a damn Sumo wrestler. I can barely walk on it without pain." "Oh you're just trying to change the subject because you know I'm right about this!" At this point, I forgot what the fuck we were even arguing about." "Okay Michael, you're right. I'm lying. Never mind." I got dressed and headed out for my 16 hour day of work. When I got there I hobbled through the door and showed the older woman I was relieving because I was truly stumped. I whipped down my pants without thought because it hurt so badly I figured maybe she...